JINDAL NOT READY FOR PRIMETIME

I don’t know much about this Gov. Bobby Jindal from down in Louisiana but he has got a lot to learn about politics. First off he must realize he cannot win again because he looks like one of the stars from ‘Slumdog Millionaire’ and gets to reply to the President’s speech. From looking at him he will need to get his birth certificate checked. It doesn’t bother me, heck I am a Democrat and I voted for Obama but Jindal is a Republican and they get pretty touchy about these things. If he wants to run for President in the next election I would want him let Sen. Richard Shelby check his birth certificate. He just don’t look American to me. Sen. Shelby is the one who checks all this stuff about birth certificates and such, judging from comments about his not having checked President Obama’s. Louisiana does not require that you even be a citizen of the United States to be governor, it has something to do with the Napoleonic Code they continue to operate under.

Another thing he will need to learn is to lie better. This week in his speech he made from under that staircase in the governor’s mansion he told about some conversation he overheard during the Katrina mess. Supposedly some Sheriff was on the phone when little Bobby got to the rescue station and was talking on the phone with one of the geniuses from Emergency Management Agency. This Sheriff was telling the EMA to let the local BASS club launch their boats to start picking citizens off their roofs and the EMA was insisting on the boat owners showing proof of insurance before they took off. According to Jindal the Sheriff told them they were going to have to pry the oars and steering wheels of these boats out of the operators cold dead hands to stop them. When the Sheriff looked up and saw little Bobby standing there he added they would also have to pry Bobby’s hands off the oars to. Turns out none of that really happened but Jindal thought it made a good story and he had no intention of letting a few facts get in the way. I don’t blame him at all. Now here is where he has trouble being a politician. You have got to make it bigger, remember George W. talking about his valiant service during Viet Nam in the Air Guard. The truth about him playing ‘tonk’ at the officers club at Maxwell Air Force base during the 60 days he was on active duty was never heard. Hell, at least 70% of everyone that voted for Reagan believed he really played for Notre Dame went by the nickname ‘Gipper’. And how many of us will ever forget Al Gore’s claim to have invented the Internet. I‘ve got relatives now that believe Al invented it and the Morse Code.

Now if it was me or anyone else from Winston Co. and we had gotten in front of some T.V. cameras and were given the chance to boost our image, the story would have been a little different. To start, with the image of all that water still fresh in the minds of those listening, I would have had to be soaking wet and near death freezing. Something like “I have been in the water since first light, swimming from house to house to simply assure the people clinging to live by hanging onto their chimneys help was on the way”. Notice how much more you are drawn into the story and have already begun to feel sorry for me. Next I would have gotten some mileage out of the shock I suffered and the steps I took when I heard the Sheriff pleading for help. My story would have continued, “the minute I heard the Sheriff arguing with lazy no good bureaucrats on the other end of that line I jerked the phone from his hands and through teeth almost chattering out of my mouth from cold, I screamed to the useless pantywaist on the other end of the line that I was Bobby Jindal and unless he wanted to see me in his face in ten seconds he better launch the boats”. Then the story would have gotten even better. I would have continued, now that I was on a roll, explaining how with my aides and family begging me to dry off and to at least get some clean and dry clothes I said, “leave me alone, those are my people out there clinging to life. If I don’t save them they won’t be saved. They elected me and I won’t let them down”. With that I would have told how I jumped in the first boat to leave the dock and how we worked for 42 straight hours pulling my people to safety. Now that’s a story a boy like Jindal could make some hay with.

Was he in ‘Slumdog’ or not?